Consultant

Once upon a time there was a sheepherder tending his sheep at the edge of a country road in rural Wyoming. A brand new Jeep Grand Cherokee screeched to a halt next to him. The driver, a young man dressed in a Brioni suit, Cerrutti shoes, Ray-Ban glasses, Jovial Swiss wristwatch and a BHS tie, jumped out and asked the herder "If I guess how many sheep you have, will you give me one of them?"

The herder looked at the young man, then looked at the sprawling herd of grazing sheep and said "Okay."

The young man parked the SUV, connected his notebook and wireless modem, entered a NASA site, scanned the ground using satellite imagry and a GPS, opened a database and 60 Excel tables filled with algorithms, then printed a 150-page report on his high-tech mini-printer. He turned to the herder and said "You have exactly 1,586 sheep here."

The herder answered "Say, you are right. Pick out a sheep." The young man took one of the animals and put it in the back of his vehicle.

As he was preparing to drive away, the herder looked at him and asked "Now, if I guess your profession, will you pay me back in kind?"

The young man answered "Sure."

The herder said immediately "You are a consultant."

"Exactly! How did you know?" asked the young man.

"Very simple," replied the herder. "First you came here without being invited. Secondly, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew. Thirdly, you do not understand anything about my business, and I'd really like to have my dog back."